Day Seventeen: Motivation Check No. 4 Self-Deprecation

SELF-DEPRECATION: Belittling or undervaluing oneself

Self-deprecators crack jokes at their own expense. Self-deprecators use negative tirades to motivate themselves. You tell a self-deprecator her outfit is beautiful and she’ll tell you “oh, this old ugly ratty awful thing. I got it for a $1 at the Goodwill.” You tell him he did a great job and he points out every flaw. Some great comediennes who are/were big on self-deprecation were Phyllis Diller, Joan Rivers, and Tina Fey. Why is self-deprecation a bad motivator? Because it glorifies negative self-talk and self-loathing. Because it is a cover for insecurity, whereby the self-deprecator gets a fleeting feeling of false control over other people’s perception of them.

Now, please don’t misunderstand me. We all should be able to laugh at our own humanity, our goofiness, our silliness, etc… If you fall get up and laugh. BUT don’t get up and proceed to tell everyone for three minutes about how horrible and awful and clumsy you are. We all fall over sometimes. 

If there is anything on your list of dreams and goals that made its way there because of a negative tirade, then perhaps you should stop working on that particular goal and deal with the underlying root problem. For example, if you say “I need to lose weight because I am a fat pig”, then the weight issue is likely symptomatic of some inner issues you really need to deal with first. If you are trying to pump yourself up in the morning by calling yourself a lazy bum, that kind of self-deprecating motivation will not last; it will eventually exhaust you. Stop the negative tirades! 

Beating yourself up may get you from Point A to Point B, but you’ll arrive very bruised and hurt. If Z is the destination then you’ll be too beat up and disheartened to ever get there. If this sounds like you, then ask God for help accepting that He Loves You. He doesn’t love you in spite of your flaws. He just loves you. Period. That’s it. Ask Him to show you how to accept His love and grace. Ask Him to teach you how to treat yourself with more compassion.

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